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a transmasc person in bed

When I found the liberation of masturbation as an adolescent, I was in awe that I was capable of this visceral euphoria. Well before my gender transition, it was my first introduction to self-love and I now consider it an essential aspect of my wellness routine.

I am trans and was assigned female at birth (AFAB), and like other folx who choose to begin testosterone hormone replacement therapy (HRT), I experienced a plethora of bodily changes, some of them more widely talked about than others. One of the earliest changes during HRT is bottom growth, or the enlarging of the clitoris, as well as changes to the labia. It is not uncommon for trans-masc people to refer to their bottom growth as their dick. With that growth comes the possibility of strokeable genitals, which can create gender euphoria. I myself cannot get off that way.  

Before transition, due to pain, I didn’t have any interest in vaginal penetration, as I found it too dysphoric. However, after being on T for a couple of years, I now occasionally find myself desiring to play with a dildo. I also came to regard my vagina as a sort of superpower and used my newfound pleasureful ability to my financial gain while occasionally masturbating on a camming website.  

Trans people also often describe their orgasms changing with gender transition. For example, one could go from experiencing intense, full body orgasms that can occur one after another, to a more dick-central orgasm that might even need a refractory period. I could see that even being gender-affirming for some. What I find most gender-affirming is squirting! Although menstruation ceases quickly for most, I notice faint, period-like cramps immediately after orgasm now, which is something I have since learned is quite common for other trans-masc people. 

Whether masturbating or playing with a partner, it’s also important to have a good water-based lubricant. This won’t interact with silicone toys and can help ensure vaginal tissues, which can become more delicate with HRT, are being cared for during a good, filthy pleasure session. It also helps with the potential dryness from testosterone.

There are an exciting amount of excellent gender-affirming and trans-friendly toys available these days. Perhaps exploring a stroker or another toy that suctions around one’s clit/dick could be new avenues of pleasure and stress release? I have several trans friends that are enamored with their toys that slide around the shaft and send waves of pleasure as it sucks them off. I myself found that my sexual interests changed, and I encourage others to lean into that without judgement. When I first came out, I identified as a cis lesbian and saw myself as more of a top, but suddenly I was into bottoming, butt plugs, and other anal toys. My porn interests changed, too. Some people on HRT, myself included, might also find their interests in sexual partners evolve into something different and that’s part of the voyage. 

Masturbation is a beautiful gift we have at our fingertips when we desire it. It’s a great way to fearlessly get to know yourself better and to possibly even have more pleasurable sex when you’re romping with a partner. If you’re a trans person reading this, hopefully you’re being patient and making time to play with yourself. Find time today to fool around with your bits, find some affirming sex toys, and enjoy the ride.



Mel McGovern
Mel McGovern
Mel McGovern (they/them) is a student of what it means to heal. They previously coached yoga and aerial circus arts and, in their free time, Mel enjoys learning about the mind and body. As a means of adapting to their disability, they have learned new ways of expressing themself, such as writing and web development.. Mel can be found on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @futurephoria.